Stokin' the Fire and Stirrin' the Pot

"That's not fair” - three words that push me to the brink of unbridled cynicism and heartless rejoinders.  I missed the memo that said life would be fair.  I'm not sure but I'd wager a guess that more than a couple of terrible things have happened in your life that weren't 'fair'.  I bet you didn't even do anything do deserve them.  Oh wait, that would have made them fair.  Silly me.

Point(s) of clarification: I am not talking about "Can you help me to understand?" or "I'm really struggling through submitting on this but I'm working on it."  I am also not talking about conversations with God.   If there's anywhere that it's safe to vent our frustrations about a lack of equity in our lives it's with God.  Of course, He won't let us stay there but at least He knows exactly the right way to guide us forward.  What I AM talking about is short-sighted, blinders on, earplugs in unwillingness to remove ourselves from the center of the universe and remember that it's not all about us. 

Now this gets tricky.  I could very easily slip into goading you to ignore injustice in your life.  However, unfair and unjust are miles apart from one another.  The latter is a violation of the truth of God and grieves His heart.  We are commanded to take a stand against this, although we rarely do because it requires sacrifice and courage.  The former is me not getting my way, which we often take a stand against because it requires very little risk – just some fit throwing.  Sometimes we grown-ups (I use that term loosely with myself) are pretty darn crafty about how we throw a fit, too.  We are much more subtle, conniving, and vicious than wee ones.  We would probably be better off to just stomp our feet and scream a bit because that is harder to mask as righteous indignation or some sort of heroic quest against the vile oppressors, who are generally our loving brothers and sisters in Christ, that we do battle against with rumors, defamation of character, and passive-aggressive behavior (to name just a few of our favored weapons). 

Okay, my soap box is starting to get a bit shaky under my feet so I should probably step down.  I’m not sure that I’m solidly on the road to edification with this.  I just wonder if sometimes we need to hear it straight before transitioning to ‘how do we move on from here’.  The reality is that I say or act “it’s not fair” more often than I’d like to admit in my own life.  People like to get their way, myself included.  What I have begun trying to do is examine my heart when I’m ticked off by an unfair situation and see if: my expectations are unrealistic, my desire to ensure my ‘rights’ is clouding my judgment, I’m taking on someone else’s offense, I’m just generally tired and grumpy and looking for something (or someone) to take it out on – basically am I just being a selfish three lettered beast of burden and covering it up by decrying the ‘injustice’ of it all. 

Most of the time I just need to get over myself and find something worthwhile to spend my energy on.  It is amazing to me, when I actually do this, how large a capacity for ‘unfair’ I actually have.  Shockingly, I find that I actually grow closer to the heart of God, am less of a jerk to be around, and actually have some level of true humility cultivated in my life.  Those of you who know me well will, no doubt, attest to an urgent need in my life to “get over myself and find something worthwhile to spend my energy on” more frequently as evidenced by my regularly being a jerk and a significant lack of true humility.  If the only person that listens to the admonition I’m giving here is me, I’m sure God will consider it a win.  Isn’t it funny how the stuff we struggle with is the stuff that sends us off the deep end when we see it in other peoples’ lives?  I’ve got this funny feeling that somebody said something at some point about specks and planks.  Nah, must be indigestion.